Sidelined!

12Mar08

I re-hurt my shoulder!

Last year (I think it was last year… or was it they year before… or was it just EARLY last year so that it seems like two years ago?)

Anyway, last year (I think) I had to go to physical therapy for my left shoulder. The therapist said it could have been many things, but mostly she blamed it on my heavy shoulder bag which I always carry on my left.

Sunday my dumb ass was swinging a 20 pound kettlebell around, banging it up against my shoulders and forearms trying to do cleans. UGH! Monday I did weight work and did feel a little stiffness in my back and shoulder, but I didn’t think too much of it. Tuesday morning I felt a little pain but by Tuesday night it was really hurting. I did use heat, then ice, and then heat again, which is what my therapist did when I went to therapy, but it’s still a little sore. So rather than aggravate it any more with weights, I’m gonna keep using the ice/heat therapy for the rest of the week and see what happens. If by Monday/Tuesday of next week it doesn’t feel like it’s getting any better then off to the doctor I go.

I’m a little disappointed, but not. I can still do cardio, which is good and I am pretty sure I can do some AWT, but heavy weights is out, at least for now. Although initially I was all gung-ho about the NROL4W program, lately, I’ve been kinda BLA with it. Iv’e been kinda bla with everything lately though. I kinda miss losing weight. I miss my videos. I miss steady state cardio.

I might stop NROL and go back to what I was doing before. Or something.

I feel STUCK. But not stuck. I feel like I need to go back to some kind of routine. I mean I know NROL has a routine, weights 3 times a week, etc. But I feel like that’s not enough. I NEED endurance cardio, even if it’s just to make me feel better. Or heck, I’ll even take HIIT, because I did enjoy doing it on the treddy. But by the time I’m done with the half hour of weight work I can’t do anything else, I’m so drained. And I need to be doing something else. Then on non-lifting days I’m only getting in maybe 30-40 minutes of moderate intensity cardio and that ain’t gonna help me either. After the weight work I’ll say “oh I’ll do the HIIT tomorrow AND the cardio. But it’s just too much for me. I wouldn’t mind the weight work if I wasn’t so drained aft.

But then again my eating hasn’t been the best either. That’s yet another issue for me, so much so that I’m thinking about seeing someone for it. Like a counselor or a therapist or something. I made an appointment tomorrow, but I’m afraid to go. What would I say? “I think I have overeating disorder?” Which I think I do. I mean it’s not severe, but I think it might have the potential to be severe and I don’t want it to get to that point. I’m just afraid. Sometimes I have these out of body experiences and can’t control myself. Most of the time it’s after a meal, lunch or dinner. I’m finished eating, but still feel like I want to eat MORE. It was always something I struggled with, but was able to control. Lately, I haven’t been able to do so and you can only imagine how it’s affecting my weight. It’s hard. I can’t stop myself and I want to, badly. I just feel so LOST, so out there, like just spinning, spinning out of control really. I need to regain control. Every week I go to my WW meeting on Saturday and say “Okay! New week! Here we go!” And it ends up just like the last week. Me being okay for a day or two, then boom, I’m back to an episode of binge eating and it will keep going until the next Saturday. Then the cycle starts all over again.

I’m gonna take the rest of the week to just relax, relate, release, reflect and create a new workout schedule for myself using what I’ve got, DVD’s, Cardio Coach CD, and perhaps the NROL book. I just feel like I’ll fare better with a routine, instead of not knowing what I’ll do from day to day, at least with the workouts. Now food? That’s another matter entirely.

On a happier note… I GOT MY TAX RETURN!!!! I’m SOOO happy. The last time I got a tax return was…. I can’t remember when. Since I had two jobs for a good three years on and off, I never really got much of a return. Last year I only had one job so I got a little chunk of change back from the IRS. Here are my plans:

1. Pay for my cruise to Mexico

2. Pay off my Amex and Visa and then use said Visa to purchase a new computer

3. Shampoo my bedroom carpet. Now that the cat’s gone I can shampoo that thing and finally get up the cat hair that’s been sitting in there festering.

4. A new queen sized bed, dresser and tv stand for the bedroom. My mom’s talking about going to Raymour and Flanagan. I was thinking more like Ikea. I have no desire to put any more furniture on credit. She’s worried about the car and how I’m gonna carry everything home. I’ll rent a van, find a dolly and make it work.

5. More fitness gear! Although my eating kinda sucks, I still do enjoy working out, and trying new things. I just ordered P90X from QVC. I have a feeling it’s a little more advanced than I am at this time, but I can’t wait to preview them and see if the workouts will provide the structure I’m needing.

Filed under: weight loss   |  
Tags: cardio, hiit, pain, hurt, arm, physical therapy, kettlebell, NROL4W, psychologist, binge eating, cardio coach, tax return, cruise, Mexico, bed, P90X